Blue Sap and Rabbit Crap

I apologise for the length of this story, it was a long day out and I did take a lot of photos.  Hope you can get to the end.

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I wasn’t too late to still be in bed, after all its Sunday I thought, as I lay contemplating the things I could do that day. It didn’t occurred to me to think about those things I knew I should do. My habit of waking early and just thinking sometimes pays dividends, I might suddenly remember where I put the missing chocolate bar I hid from the wife, important things like that. This particular Sunday I had a great idea, there was a free entry coupon to a botanic garden in my wallet. I moved as far away from the wife as I could before elbowing her in the ribs, the swelling around my eye still hasn’t gone down from last time. “Come on” I said, “the days wasting, we have places to go.” “Shut up!”... I left the bed heading for the shower with no further comment.

On checking the web site I saw the cafe in the garden was closed for renovations, we needed food, drinks, snacks, map, I should have made a list. As I packed up the camera gear I was amazed to see the wife walking out the door, “Where are you...?” I couldn’t believe it, she had to go for her newspaper, “It’s 9, the place opens at 10... hurry up!” I knew I was wasting my breath, the gardens are 15 minutes away, we finally arrived at 11:00.

The garden first opened about 22 years ago, I remember because the kids were around knee high. We had gone to see what the fuss was about. The place is over 400 hectares, 3.5 k north to south and 1.5 or so across, a lot of lawn to mow. “It’s a botanic garden not a zoo” the wife said with obvious glee when I commented on my hope of shooting some animals. I don’t have many pleasures in life, a witty come back is one, but for the second time that day I remembered the eye. She’s getting good as it turned out, I didn’t see any animals, only evidence of their existence. My free entry pass covered one person, it was for entry to participate in a photography competition focused, so to speak, on the botanic garden. I suppose they don’t know about wives for carrying tripods, bags and lunch packs, anyway it cost me $5.00 to get her in. After I agreed to stopping at the gift shop for a quick browse, the wife grudgingly volunteered to bear the burden of my camera bag as we attempted the hill opposite the parking lot.

The area is named “The Connections Garden”, according to the brochure it’s “A roofless museum of corridors, vistas, and spaces where visitors discover the interconnectedness of humans and the natural world.” It seemed to have a lot of trees and plants with winding paths, some of which were blocked for construction or new plantings. It was very peaceful and, green. I noticed that “connectivity” with nature was well catered for with spots for wedding photographs, lots of wonderful backdrops of tropical and forest plants, and some water features, as well as beautiful dry stone walls. I was setting up for a shot of a tall, dark green, pine type tree when the wife decided she needed the car keys. A little apprehensive, I asked the obvious question. It seems she had left her “historical novel” in the car, not really an outdoor girl.  It was a fair walk back to car park so I was happy she went alone.

My new tripod has two spirit levels built into it, this is great for getting the land and sky in the right places but it takes a little while to adjust all three legs and that lever twist thing on the side. As I was replacing the lens cap, I heard a distant shout of my now familiar name, you might think I would know “John” after all these years, but the wife doesn’t think so, she shouts it quite often to remind me. I walked back down the trail until I could see her in the distance at the car, after some hand signing it became clear she couldn’t unlock the door. With a sigh I gathered up the gear and started back down, it was a pretty steep hill, and the detours for construction meant quite a climb. She managed to get the door open just as I could see the whites of her eyes, left my gun at home.

Heading back up we passed the pine tree I’d shot, and walked about another twenty steps along the winding trail before the wife noticed how high above us the top of the hill I was intent on reaching was. Finding a nice soft sandstone outcrop, no doubt strategically placed by the landscape designer, she advised that she would wait and read some until I returned. Camera strapped around my neck, tripod slung across my shoulder, I accepted the camera bag from her and advanced like, well, an out of breath old guy, I wanted to say something heroic here, but I’ll be honest in this account of my day. Now this hill wasn’t the highest in the gardens just the first, the day was young. The path was full of switchbacks zigzagging up the slope, I reached the top after about 10 minutes walk, It occurred to me that it would be an incredible coincidence if I were to have a heart attack today, I had an appointment on Friday with a specialist but had cancelled, anyway I’m still here. I had suspected the view would be good but was pleased to see the Blue Mountains in the distance, about 80 kilometres or so away. I guess the air was a little polluted back in the late 1700’s when they were named, they were blue looking today as well. I knew this area of Sydney was the fastest growing in Australia but didn’t expect to see so many houses crowding the gardens, and more development underway.

I discovered that it’s easier to go down hills than go up, must be something to do with nature, in spite of the easy walk down I spent the next few minutes checking the map, I wasn’t going to walk anymore if I could drive, after all this is the day of rest. We could still hear the sound of falling water somewhere in the wooded hillside, so off we went. I was trying to pick photo opportunities which didn’t include signs which said things like “rare”, “endangered”, “remote”, or “don’t litter”, while the wife was stopping to read them as if they were written by Barbara... something or other. While I paused to take photos the wife was getting bored, she said “I’ll just take this trail and meet you down there at the waterfall.” You couldn’t see the water but unless they had speakers and sound effects it would be in that general direction. I wasn’t serious about the photo contest which had brought me there, but was making an effort to shoot just about everything that was green. Looking for unusual angles and views can be dangerous, I had thought it was just the wife panicking, but both boys have started yelling at me as well when I drive, photography can do that to you, they could be right though, eyes are in the front of the head for some reason. I didn’t break the camera but I hurt my knees a few times as I tripped over steps and things.

I found myself on a trail above the pool of water and was taking some shots when I heard my name again. “Where are you?” she shouted ,from quite a distance and up the hill by the sound of it. I shouted “Down here near the pond”, “Where? I can’t see you or the water, I’m lost.” She was getting more distant. All I could do was keep taking photos and shout “Down here!” occasionally. A momentary image of men with flashlights searching into the night crossed my mind, as I spotted a fern growing on a tree. I heard her every now and then, sometimes louder sometimes fainter, down deep I knew she would be okay, there were fences all around the place and she was carrying the food and drink, that made me think, it was nearly lunch time. I had finished with the woods and wanted to get down to the pond and waterfall, the trails are covered with fine bark, almost sawdust which was nice to walk on but didn’t really give me a clear idea where they led. I could see the water, but not how to get down, that’s when I saw the wife. She had been quite for some time now, busily snapping photos I had almost forgotten about her being lost. You wouldn’t believe it, she was sitting on some rocks next to the water. I walked back and forth looking for a way down and finally had to do the deed, “How did you get down there? I asked after making sure no one was around. That’s all I have to say about that.

“That took you long enough” she said as I arrived, I’m sure it had only been fifteen minutes since I spotted her, the trails wandering all over the place was a good excuse, I didn’t dare mention her being lost, quick as a flash I said “Can I have a bottle of water?” This was one of the wedding photos sites, a little bridge over the stream and a dock made of weathered planks added to the “ambiance” of the scene. I couldn’t be a wedding photographer, I’d stuff it up and have a tearful bride haunting my dreams for eternity. I took a couple of shots feeling it must be mandatory since they had gone to the trouble of building the scene, I already have ponds and streams filed under “Photos”; “Water, Ponds, Streams”.

It was definitely lunch time, we reached the car and decided to eat my carefully prepared repast. As the cafe was closed, an opportunistic vendor had parked his “Gourmet Coffee” van near the Kiosk, we decided the $4.00 slice of cake he offered wasn’t as appetising as my...oh shit, I had brought the blue snack bag but forgot the red one, it had the sandwiches. We settled for my bags of chips and Nestle Crunch bars for lunch, quite filling. I ate and the wife glowered at me, I looked over the map again, planning my next expedition route, she made funny stomach rumbles, or was that a growl.

There are narrow one way vehicle roads around the garden, with walking trails, which are wheelchair friendly, heading off into the distance leading to mysterious sounding places. “Sundial of Human Involvement”, Wollemi Walk of Discovery”, “Callitris Grove”, I thought Callitris meant... no. We headed for the Sundial, the day was more than half over and we had only visited ONE spot. It wasn’t my fault, I hadn’t had to read the morning paper, I didn’t get lost, much, I didn’t forget how to unlock the car door, but let’s face it, at the end of the day, it’s all my fault anyway.

I was anticipating our reaching a spot marked on the map as “Mount Annan Summit” even I, though relatively unschooled in things botanic, knew that “summit” meant the top of something. Being a high achiever, summits, or tops of things attract me, we made a couple of stops at places called wetlands and plains which had trees and bushes apparently native to those places around Australia. As my free pass covered three visits, I decided to come back and take photos there next time, unless those housing developments moved fast these native areas would still be there for a while, wouldn’t they?

With a label like “Summit” I expected the Mt Annan Summit to be rather higher than the hill we, or rather I, had climbed earlier, and as we drew nearer the Sundial of Human Involvement, it was obvious that sundials lived at altitude as well. Driving as near as possible I parked and said, “Here we are, the best view in town you must come up with me.” Her window was on the side facing the hill, as she looked out the window slowly lowering her head allowing her eyes to look up toward the top, she said in a crisp decisive manner, “Fine.” My heart leapt, I wouldn’t have to carry all the gear up there myself, I’d try and analysis her motives later. The paved walking path snaked its way to the top but I decided that the slope was gentle enough to climb straight up saving time, we were losing sunlight fast. Gathering our gear we started up at a swift clip, which lasted three or four paces before levelling off into a crawl we could maintain for at least another couple of minutes. I didn’t keep track of time but the sun was decidedly lower when we reached what I thought was the peak.

It wasn’t, just over the peak the trail we had cut across dropped downward for 5 meters then veered right and upwards, toward another peak. We hadn’t seen this higher peak since a stand of trees blocked the view. I’ve never claimed to be good at map reading, I often say “I wish I had a compass,” such was the situation I found there. You see, the damn road we parked on below us continued for some way then turned left and up the other side of the peak, it joined the walking trail we had cut across right there where we were standing.

From the level we were on I could see Eastward toward the ocean, our suburb was about five or six kilometres from where we were. I shot some photos then looked at the wife who had collapsed onto a bench placed there for just that purpose as well as being a dedication to someone who had helped develop the garden. I didn’t explain our wasted effort, I simply said “At least when we get back to the car we can drive closer to the Sundial of Human Involvement.” Thank God she hadn’t caught her breath. She decided to follow the trail back down the hill while I, remembering that down is easier than up cut across again. The drive to the nearest parking for a short walk to the Sundial, took long enough for us to catch our breath and have a drink, it certainly allowed the wife to catch her breath, she had plenty for a scream.

After we drove across the walking track leading to the sundial I started pulling over to the shoulder to park, grabbing my arm in a vice like grip she screamed like I’ve never heard her before. “Stop! we’re going over the edge! we’re going to fall! stop!! This was loud stuff, honestly I have never been so shocked and surprised, I guess that was because we were in absolutely no danger whatsoever, that I could see. When I finally understood what she meant, which only took a split second, but seemed like ages, I attempted a laugh. She refused to walk on the grass verge, as you can see in the photo we were in great danger. This was turning into a interesting day.

By now I had decided that one or two more stops would be all I could manage today, the sundial, then around the perimeter of the garden to see what else to check out next visit. We walked along the trail and up to the best stop we had found this particular day.

It was still a pretty steep climb to the sundial and we had decided that Mt Annan Summit would have to do without our visit, this was high enough. The anticipation of getting there was worth it as was the climb, the view was great, all the way to Sydney. The sky was still pretty clear and sharp so I got a few good skyline pictures, none that would win a contest but at least I can say “I took that.” While I was busy with the camera gear, the wife decided that the story in the book was better than the view, she had her head in it the whole time. Everywhere we had been that day we saw evidence of rabbits, those little pellets they leave behind as well as the holes they dig looking for grass roots to eat, kangaroo droppings were all over the place as well.

I had been keeping an eye out for Birds, Roos and Reptiles, but hadn’t spotted any, other than the large crow I frightened the wife with by saying they love pecking long hair, it was on a branch just above her head, she squealed like a girl. She didn’t like rabbit poo for some reason, I was raised around wildlife and farmyard animals, and was familiar with the sight and smell. When I asked her to pick up my camera case which was sitting on the grass, she refused, “Rabbit poo’s all over it, I’m not touching that stuff” she was adamant. It had been a long day, I had climbed mountains, survived being lost in the wilderness, been screamed at, poo was the least of my concerns. We were going to wrap this up and head home after the “round the fence’ drive on the way out. I lowered the tripod to get better angles, sat down and finished my shots.

We started down the mountain skipping stops I hope to visit during the next trip, that is until a great discovery... I was amazed when rounding a curve to see in a field beside the road, “The Blue Tree,” This had to be a new species, leafless, alone and, no other word for it “BLUE”. “There you go” I said to the wife, “they were hiding the best for last back here in the corner of the gardens”. I had to get a close up photo so grabbed the tripod and walked across the field, yep, it was really blue. I haven’t got the full story on this yet, but will investigate further, it must have something to do with global cooling, things do go blue with cold you know.

Approaching the exit we found an interesting point of interaction between nature and humans, an effort had been made to accommodate the needs of one of the local inhabitants, the Cumberland Land Snail, meridolum corneovirens. From the scientific name I gather this is one of the vicious breeds of snail, eats meat. We saw three of the brutes leaving the area.

I had a good sleep that night, went to bed at 10:00 and woke at 5:30 am to the smell of farmyard. I had forgot the rabbit crap, took off my jeans and left them laying on the floor all night. I picked them up and had a look, sure enough the bum was spotted with little brown dots from when I sat on the grass to shoot photos. I’m glad they don’t keep cows in the botanic garden, I did sit in the car on the way home, we had stopped at that supermarket, yea... my favourite place on the couch, that’s always the way isn’t it, a househusbands work is never done. List for next trip, compass, sandwiches, hat, plastic bag for sitting on, wouldn’t go anywhere without, the wife.

JAWhite                                           Back to Main Page
June 2010

Photos: JAWhite